Miley Cyrus' Flowers & Our Future
I saw this tweet / retweet on Twitter…
Tweet: “Why aren’t marriages lasting like our grandparents?”
Retweet: “Women are allowed to have checking accounts.”
It has to be considered. Back in the days of my grandmother, when women were tethered to the home and children clutching their hemlines (which I acknowledge works and fulfills some, but not all), there was no way out. Without money, there is no future, and without agency, there is no hope. And even if - for some, those handcuffs were welcome, for others - they were not. Regardless of what you wanted, you had limited options for a world larger than the one you entered with ‘I do.’ If you had been sold a bill of goods, or grew to see yourself in a different geography or life, there was no doorway to take you there.
Miley Cyrus launched a song last week. Flowers. Turns out it’s had 90,000,000 downloads; yes that is ninety million downloads in less than a week. The most played song on Spotify in one week ever. It’s a catchy tune that will bring a prideful rise in any woman who has moved past a bad relationship and not sent herself immediately into another. It fills you with pride that you have the resources today to provide your own happiness. But I believe the reason it is doing so well is more about the message and less about the tune.
If you are one of the few million who haven’t heard it, watch her now.
I taped myself singing with my hairbrush as my mic, and sent it to just a few close friends who I know will find it impossible to avoid joining me in song and dance this wintery Monday morning. (I would have sent it to more, but there are some unfortunate aging spots that are not working for me front and center.) Empower me any day Miley. And, by the way, I have grown to love your tattoos. You be you girl. I’m finally being me.
Here are the lyrics so you too can sing along.
Flowers
We were good, we were gold
Kinda dream that can't be sold
We were right 'til we weren't
Built a home and watched it burn
Mm, I didn't wanna leave you
I didn't wanna lie
Started to cry but then remembered I
I can buy myself flowers
Write my name in the sand
Talk to myself for hours
Say things you don't understand
I can take myself dancing
And I can hold my own hand
Yeah, I can love me better than you can
Can love me better
I can love me better, baby
Can love me better
I can love me better, baby
Paint my nails, cherry red
Match the roses that you left
No remorse, no regret
I forgive every word you said
Ooh, I did not wanna leave you, baby
I didn't wanna fight
Started to cry but then remembered I
I can buy myself flowers
Write my name in the sand
Talk to myself for hours, yeah
Say things you don't understand
I can take myself dancing, yeah
I can hold my own hand
Yeah, I can love me better than you can
Can love me better
I can love me better, baby
Can love me better
I can love me better, baby
Can love me better
I can love me better, baby
Can love me better
Oh, I
I did not wanna leave you
I didn't wanna fight
Started to cry but then remembered I
I can buy myself flowers (oh)
Write my name in the sand (mmh)
Talk to myself for hours (yeah)
Say things you don't understand (never will)
I can take myself dancing, yeah
I can hold my own hand
Yeah, I can love me better than
Yeah, I can love me better than you can
Can love me better
I can love me better, baby (oh)
Can love me better
I can love me better (than you can), baby
Can love me better
I can love me better, baby
Can love me better
Wow I love that song. And I'm not one to love songs when first heard. Thank you for sharing. Perhaps my next comments are relevant and timely to your article. This came up for me this past weekend on my visit to my parents in FL. My mother told me a story, which I've heard before but worth repeating according to her and I agree. When she and my father went to the bank to get a loan for the new house they wanted to build back in 1972, the bank only took into account my father's wages and not my mother who was working as a banquet waitress and making good and steady money. Because she was a women and therefore, I guess seen as "not reliable contributor", they couldn't take out the loan they wanted and had to rely on other means which took longer to get the money they needed. Growing up during that time, I, as a little girl had limited options in sports, among many other things, compared with my brother. I was pissed about that then and I can only imagine how angry I would be today if I was told, my income didn't matter - meaning "I didn't matter". Still shocking to me but grateful we're at least beyond that now.